Secret Santa with kids: how to include children fairly

The easiest way to include kids in Secret Santa is to let them receive only: each child gets one gift from one grown-up, and the adults draw names among themselves as usual. That way every child has a present to open, and nobody ends up buying twenty gifts for a big family.

This guide shows how to set it up, what to agree on beforehand and how to keep the surprise intact for the children.

Should kids draw names too?

Small children can't buy a gift, and older children often need a lift to the shop. If everyone, kids included, draws a name, the adults end up doing the shopping twice. Two simple ways to handle it:

1. Kids receive only. Each child gets one gift from one adult. This is the easiest for big families.
2. Teenagers draw like adults. Older kids who can pick and pay for a gift join the main draw. Only the youngest are receive-only.

Pick the line that fits your family and say it in the invitation, so nobody is surprised.

Agree on the rules before the draw

A few minutes of agreement saves a lot of awkwardness later.

• A budget for kids' gifts. It can be the same as for adults, or lower. Write it down.
• Parents don't give to their own kids through the draw. Parents already buy for their own children, so the draw should send each child to a different grown-up.
• Who counts as a grown-up? Decide where the line is for teenagers and cousins.
• A wish list for every child. A parent can write it together with the child. It saves the giver from guessing.

If you want more on the basics, read How to organise a Secret Santa that everyone enjoys and Secret Santa rules – 8 simple rules that make it more fun.

How it works in JingleBell

JingleBell has a setting for exactly this. Kids join as receivers only.

1. The organiser starts the event at JingleBell. If the organiser takes part, they add their own kids while creating the event.
2. Other parents add their kids when they join, and they write and edit each child's wish list on their own personal page.
3. The organiser can also add kids under any adult from the event page.
4. When the organiser presses Draw names, each kid is given to one adult. It is never their parent, and never someone the organiser has kept apart from that parent. The kids are spread evenly between the adults.
5. Each giver's message says they also have a gift for one of the kids. Their personal page shows the child and the wish list.

Kids have no email or phone number, so they get no messages. Nobody, not even the organiser, can see who gives to a kid, so the surprise holds.

What the draw needs

• At least 3 adults in the draw.
• At most 10 kids per adult.
• Kids count toward the free 10 and toward the price. For example, 8 adults and 4 kids is 12 people, which is the Team plan.

Groups of up to 10 people are free. From 11 people you pay once per event, when names are drawn, and the draw button always shows the price. There is no subscription.

What if a child is added after the draw?

The new child goes to the adult who has the fewest kids. Nobody else's child is moved to a different adult, so nobody who has already bought a gift is told to start over.

Tips for a calm gift opening

• Open the kids' gifts together, so no child waits while others unwrap.
• Ask givers to label the gift with the child's name only, not their own.
• Keep to the budget. Children rarely notice the price, but parents notice the difference between gifts.
• Let teenagers keep the guessing game going: they like finding out who their Secret Santa was.

FAQ

Can kids be part of a Secret Santa?

Yes. The simplest way is to let kids receive only: each child gets one gift from one grown-up, picked in the draw.

Does a parent draw their own child?

No. In JingleBell the draw never gives a child to their own parent, or to anyone the organiser has kept apart from the parent.

How many gifts does each adult buy?

Each adult buys for the person they drew. If they are also given a kid, the message says they have a gift for one of the kids too. Nobody buys for every child.

Do kids count toward the free 10 people?

Yes. Kids count toward the free 10, the price and the limit of 200 people.

Can a child see who their Secret Santa is?

Not unless the giver tells them. Kids get no messages, and nobody, not even the organiser, sees who gives to a kid.